procrastinate

Today google told me, that for my whole life, I've been doing a mistake. ... That is, mispelling 'procrastinate'. I had been spelling it 'proscratinate' whole time.

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first times -- part two --

There are many things I did for the first time in the recent year, and not all of them is told here.

I bought two sets of pierre cardin's undie. I bathed at two chinese-speaking cities. I ate gan guo (literal: dry pot). I watched Madura island from the air above.

I sold clothes via bbm. I tried disciplining a subordinate and failed.

First time in my life, only done in the recent year, if you know what I mean.

I'd like to mention that selling clothes via bbm requires A LOT of hardware requirements. Don't do it if you're lack of patience, either. It felt like having press caught a public figure after a night at the club. People are like paparazzi, they ask questions and won't let go.

There are many things I did for the first time in the recent year, and not all of them is good.

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happiness is...

My cousin's wife likes to spend her money (which is a lot) on clothes. Whenever she's bored with a piece of clothing, she gives it to me. Sometimes it fits my body. Sometimes it doesn't. I bring those that don't fit to a tailor to have them mended.

Sometimes happiness is not having new things. Sometimes happiness is making better of what you already have.

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read arabic phonetically

I'm curious why google translate doesn't provide 'read phonetically' feature for Arabic language, whereas such feature exists for other non-alphabet languages (Chinese, Japanese, Russian). Anyone knows?

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forsaking delphi

I have been thinking for awhile why many programmers in mainland China stopped coding in Delphi altogether. Tonight it dawned on me, could it be because Delphi's code completion (Ctrl+ Space) conflicts with Chinese keyboard?

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what is your excuse now?

Rome wasn't built in a day, but Prambanan Temple was. :D

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looper

Assumption is the fastest way to self-ridicule... When will I learn?

Seeing Bruce Willis on the cast, I bought tickets to this movie because I wanted to be numb. Not thinking, not considering my options, not planning anything. Just stare at the screen blankly for awhile.

But this movie invoke thoughts. Between causality of time-travel events and murdering future criminal while they're still infants, the lightest one is this: what on earth is the name of the liquid drug that is taken by dropping it into one's eye? And I don't mean things like eyedrop solutions. The drug is the kind that can make you high.

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love is in the eyes of the beholder

When you assume, you make an ass out of you and me.
-- Silence of The Lambs --

Assuming is a dangerous thing to do. Given everybody is unique, if there are four persons in a room, there can be 4 different political views. We all know that. Yet when it comes to love, we assume. When someone says that he/she loves us, we assume that we are the only one. We assume that the person tells the truth, will sacrifice for us, infatuated with us. We assume, assume, assume until truth hits us and brings us back to reality.

It is not always that the other person lies. We think love standard is the same for everyone. Bad news: it isn't. I know one guy who thinks that if he provides for his wife and children, then he has loved them enough, so he's free to do infidelities. As twisted as it may seem, many men thinks that way.

Another not-so-bizzare-but-not-less-strange example is this guy. He doesn't have a watch. He strongly believe that after he has a watch, he will get a girlfriend.

So let me end this post with a quote from Bob Marley: "You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She's not perfect - you aren't either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don't hurt her, don't change her, don't analyze and don't expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she's not there."

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i am open to suggestions

I have spent several years trying to live this life and as far as I can understand, I live well, however, I am not sure if one part is lived the way it is supposed to be -

... On second thought, I am not open to suggestions.

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how to be a man

This morning I read a comic book titled 'How to be a Man'. A 17 years old girl has a love interest who is 7 years younger than her. Eventually they dated each other.

The author said: "If I write a story with common theme, it will be too easy for the readers to guess where the story goes." He also said, "... I don't want you to become such person that read a book because everybody is reading that book, or watch a movie because everyone else has watched it..."

Okay, but the boy is an elementary school student, do you really need to write such a story?

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the need of cleaning up -- part two

Anyway. I can't help but taking note of the decreasing amount of text messages I received. In 2008, I received about 10 messages per day. Nowadays, one week is needed to come to that amount.

But I don't feel lonely. Communication has shifted to virtual means, that is messengers and social sites. However, when I clean up the phone, I found names I haven't been in touch for some times.

Apparently while I'm virtually social, I spend less time and effort keeping in touch with friends outside the reach of social virtual equipments.

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the need of cleaning up

I've been writing blog a lot lately. It means I have nothing better to do than this.
-- SUFFIX --

About a week ago I checked my phone and noticed that it's responding to my commands slower than usual. I scheduled for an inbox-cleaning (734 messages! I wonder why that 2GBs memory of my phone hasn't stopped functioning at all.) but keep procrastinating until today.

Well, I'm forced to do that, because it takes forever to open one message. And message sent by a friend comes to my phone only after 8 hours. Imagine.

So, I stopped proscratinating.

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school of life

Tonight I feel so empty. Not the first time though, and not hoping for same thing happen in the future, but I think it will.

Unless I do something about it. A friend once said, life is a school, and we'd be doing second grade's test, for example, again and again till we get proper mark.

I thought I got an F in Human Relationship. HR's all right, it's Pride I didn't pass.

Another friend was so sure she scored OK at Envy Studies. Well, I was sure abot that too. She's someone you can show everything to, from bonanza cars every now and then to diamond on your wed-finger, and she wouldn't blink an evil eye. However, The Professor's not so sure. Just a little mistake in her answer sheet and ta-da! That friend of mine has been burried in papers for extra points so she will pass. For months.

I just found out that I did mine wrong. No wonder my paper's older than hers.

So tonight, I guess I'll just sent some text messages of forgiveness to some people.

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hair...

I dreamt I was invited to a monument's grand opening, of which main statue was modelled after me.

It was yellowish in color, or greenish, or greyish, can't remember correctly. The pose was like New York's famous Liberty statue, but size's very different, my statue was only 10 feet tall.

I walked round to see its back, but stopped under the arm that carried a torch. "Was the sculptor in his right mind?" I exclaimed in horror, as I stared at the statue's massive amount of... armpit hair.

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the good guy

I always want to do things without people humming behind me, uttering how stupid my decisions are, how I should do other things instead of this silly little thing nobody would do.

I am always a reader. I want to read all books in the world. And when I watched The Good Guy, something inside me rebelled. This movie tells about a book club whose members are reading Lolita.

I know about Lolita. I have wanted so desperately to read it, but I declined and declined because it's an immoral story. Or so I'm told.

I will believe it no longer. Too many people open their mouth for things they don't know, or in this case, have passion about.

So... On the right side of this blog, I put a list of books i want to read. By any chance you live near me and have those books, be kind and tell me OK! I'll borrow them..

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ways of a heartbreak

And I listened to you. And I don't understand.
-- me --

I was heartbroken. Again.

It felt like a jab on your diaphragm. It felt like all your senses became clearer out of nowhere, almost two times as clear as it had used to be. And it's bad, coz you'd feel the jab on your diaphragm almost two times as painful.

I had difficulty breathing.

If your heart's ever broken, you'll know that the difficulty breathing has nothing to do with anything physical. Actually you can breath normally. Actually you DO breathe normally. But you're conviced to take the pain that would emerge had you stopped breathing.

Why would the body do such a thing, I have a theory. It's to divide the pain. If all pain should be carried mentally, one cannot resist. But divided between the heart and the body, it's still bearable.

It's interesting to observe things like this. If you're not in the position of having your heart broken, that is.

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first sign of moving on

You know you're in love when you value his opinion above any others'. You know you're out of love when you no longer care what he may think (or not think) about you.

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